However, if your emotions feel intense, it is helpful to pause, and focus on grounding yourself first such as breathing exercises, walking, or music (Although different folks have different strokes, so, feel free to do what works for you as these are just general examples).

According to Damasco (2004), our brain or limbic system processes emotions first, before we can think of a logical reason –this is called Emotional Primacy. We then try to explain those emotions using logic or the automatic thoughts that pop up (Schacter & Singer, 1962). However, automatic thoughts that are often negative and intrusive can be prone to cognitive distortion.

For example, during a state of experiencing intense negative emotions, you may find yourself stuck thinking about cognitive distortions. A few examples from David Burns’ Books include:

1. Should statements – “I should be happy because I’m not suffering as much as others.”
2. All or Nothing thinking – “I’m/They’re always breaking things.”
3. Mind Reading – “They probably think I’m weak and incompetent.”
4. Emotional Reasoning – “I feel like a failure, so I am a failure.”

Instead of challenging these intrusive thoughts, your brain may exaggerate the negative, minimize the positive, or cherry-pick what aligns with your current views –which then feeds into one’s distress even more– eventually distorting your perceptions about people, situations, and or reality.